


Lost and Found

by awaytobeunshaken



Category: Mass Effect
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-07-27
Updated: 2013-07-31
Packaged: 2017-12-21 13:02:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/900624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awaytobeunshaken/pseuds/awaytobeunshaken
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Kaidan, go. Now." Shepard had given him many orders; this was the first he felt compelled to disobey. So he did, saving her from the Normandy's destruction and giving his own life in the process... or so he thought. Two years later, Kaidan Alenko has two goals: save humanity from the Collectors, and win back the heart of the woman he loves. ME2 AU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

 

 “Kaidan, go. Now.” Shepard’s words were brief, but her intent was clear. She needed him looking after the crew, not her. In a fleeting moment it had become apparent that everything they’d gained could be lost just as quickly, and if he had to he would let it happen for the sake of duty. Because Kaidan Alenko didn’t take chances. Kaidan Alenko played it safe. But as he scanned the corridor for any stragglers, as he prepared to enter the escape pod himself, he hesitated, realizing that if there was anyone in the galaxy that was worth risking everything for, it was Shepard.

He slammed his hand on the release switch and watched the pod spin away, then turned and made his way to the bridge.

The Normandy’s deck shuddered beneath her feet as Shepard tossed Joker into the escape pod. She leaned forward to climb in behind him but another shot from their unknown foe put a stop to that. She drifted away, watching the deck crumble away between her and the pod, her chances of escape crumbling with it. Her one comfort, though, was knowing that Kaidan was safe. She had unexpectedly developed a soft spot for the biotic, and here, just as on Virmire, she wasn’t about to let anything happen to him.

Just as she’d resigned herself to her fate, she felt something lift her up, propelling her toward the pod. Glancing down, she saw herself surrounded by a blue glow, something that she’d seen hundreds of times as Kaidan expertly used his biotics to fling their enemies aside, sometimes finishing a fight before she even had a chance to take a shot. And she knew that as much as she prided herself on using her brains, her guns, or the sheer force of her personality to arrange any situation to her advantage, she was powerless to stop what was happening now.

She’d barely been released from the Lift when she saw the escape pod doors slam shut, felt it spiral away from the wreckage that had once been her home, watched the faint glimmer of starlight off Kaidan’s hardsuit as it drifted away. She pounded on the door of the escape pod, breaking free of Joker’s futile attempts to hold her back. “Damnit, Kaidan! I gave you an order! You were supposed to be in the fucking pod!”

His voice came in over her helmet radio, faint, already gasping for breath, “Sorry... Shepard. Had to...”

She screamed wordlessly as his last words faded away, not stopping until her throat was raw. Finally, she fell back into an empty seat on the pod, still staring out at space, ignoring Joker’s mumbled condolences, ignoring the radioed requests from the other pods. He was gone.

* * *

 

_I wish that I was anesthetized and sterilized_

_And then, we wouldn’t have this evidence congealing_

After Ilos, after Saren, they'd made sure to take the proper precautions. But that first night had been so desperate, so unexpected...they'd only concerned themselves with the moment. It had been foolish and romantic and so unlike her... what was it about him that had managed to disarm her so completely..

_Surprise, surprise, another pair of lips and eyes_

“A blessing,” said the old woman in that vid Becca had enjoyed so much, back on Earth. “Something to remember him by.” That would have been the most foolish thing of all. She would always remember Kaidan, and the brief time they’d had together. Some little bit of his DNA wouldn’t change that.

_And that is the consequence of actually feeling..._

Besides, she had so many other things to concern herself with. The Alliance. The Council. Career and command and duty. They were all she had left, now. Really, they were all she’d ever had. So she took the pill. And cried as the last thing she had of Kaidan bled away.

* * *

 

_“She’s alive?”_

“Yes, sir. The attack was devestating, but most of the crew survived, Shepard included.”

_“Very well. We’ll need to reach out to her then, see if she’s amenable. Contact her. She’ll want to know who attacked her ship; tell her we have information.”_

“Do I tell her whom I represent?”

_“Only if she asks.”_

* * *

 

“So tonight, we honor the memory of those we lost on the Normandy. Kaidan Alenko...”

The look was fleeting, but Anderson still recognized the shadow that overcame Shepard’s face as she read the first name. Not that he was going to accuse her of impropriety, especially not now, but he’d never seen Shepard react so strongly to a death among her crew.

“Hector Emerson, Robert Falawa, Harvey Gladstone...”

If her relationship with Alenko had gone beyond the professional, however, then her behavior over the past few days suddenly made more sense. They’d seemed quite close in the time they’d spent on the Citadel after Sovereign’s defeat as well, although he hadn’t thought anything of it at the time beyond simple camaraderie; gratitude that they’d made it out alive.

“Charles Pressley, Mandira Rahman...”

It didn’t take long for the shadow in her eyes to turn to fire. It didn’t surprise him to see her turn to anger in her grief. That fire was what made her special, what made her the best damn soldier he’d ever met. It had saved her at Elysium; he hoped it would help her heal now. Still, he’d be watching her. She wouldn’t be the first soldier he’d seen let righteous anger get the best of her.

* * *

 

_“She doesn’t trust our information, then?”_

“She doesn’t trust the source.”

_“I see. And what about our other channel.”_

“The attack on the Normandy was devastating. There was very little left intact. Most of the bodies were ripped apart.”

_“But they found something.”_

“One corpse. It appears he survived the initial attack but wasn’t able to evacuate. Went down with the ship, so to speak. His O₂ line was severed; he wouldn’t have survived til rescue.”

_“And could she tell you anything about him? Was he close to Shepard at all?”_

“They were lovers.”

_"Very well. We’ve lost nothing; the matter will simply require more gentle handling than we anticipated. Proceed with Project Lazarus.”_

* * *

 

“Shepard, this is getting out of hand, and there’s only so much I can do to protect you. You’re obsessed. It has to stop.”

“I can’t just give it up. If my information holds up, the attack on the Normandy was only the beginning. For all we know, it could be the next attempt by the Reapers to...”

“There has been no evidence that it was anything but a random attack, much less that the Reapers were involved. And you can’t take this to the Council or Alliance Command without hard evidence, not just some nameless source.” His voice lowered. “Look, I understand what you’re going through. But Alenko’s dead, and this won’t bring him back.”

“This is NOT about Alenko!” She breathed deeply, slowly, trying to calm herself. “This is about the galaxy. Look, if I hadn’t taken the Normandy to Ilos we’d have been sitting ducks for Sovereign. We’d all be dead right now.”

“It’s different now, Shepard. You have no ship, no resources...”

“I spent half my life getting by with nothing, Anderson. I’m not afraid to do it again.”

“Well, if I’m not going to talk you out of this, do one thing at least. Resign. Make it official. Don’t burn any more bridges than you have to.”

He got a call from Admiral Hackett the next day. She’d submitted her formal resignation that morning.

* * *

 

_Contains lyrics from "Carriage" by Counting Crows._

 

 


	2. Awakening

 “Lieutenant!” The voice drilled into his skull even as Kaidan struggled to comprehend it through the fog in his brain. “Lieutenant Alenko, wake up!” Whoever the woman was, she was talking to him, he realized. But where was he? How had he gotten here. He tried to remember, but was still having trouble getting through the fog. “Get up! This facility is under attack.” Those words were enough for instinct to kick in. He rolled off the bed, landing on shaky legs, and scanned the room for a weapon as he took a moment to steady himself. “There’s a pistol in that locker in the corner,” the voice said, echoing his concern.

He retrieved the gun from the locker, its weight comfortable in his hand. Beside it lay a device that he recognized as a biotic amp; on a whim he ran a hand across the base of his skull and found that he didn’t have one equipped. He inserted the amp and instinctively activated a Barrier. The hum of his biotics was familiar, yet different somehow. He didn’t have time to ponder it further, however. The voice continued to prod him.

“There are hostile mechs in the corridor outside. Take cover.” He ducked behind a crate in the medical room where he’d awoke and peered above the top to see the mech approaching. Calmly, he squeezed off three shots into the mech’s chassis, which was enough to bring it down. He headed down the corridor, which opened into a larger storage room. Several more of the mechs filed into the room from the opposite side. He took cover again behind a crate, wishing he had an omni-tool; he’d be able to make short work of the mechs with that.

Nonetheless, he managed to take them out the hard way: bullets, biotics and a little bit of patience. Convinced that he’d taken care of any hostiles in the area, he pressed on. The next corridor provided him with two unlocked doors; the first one he tried went to an office space. A recently saved video log flashed from a nearby terminal. Curious, he shut the door behind him and played the log.

The voice on the log was the same one that had awoken him a few minutes ago, and Kaidan realized he could recognize her face as well. He remembered waking up once before, in the same medbay he’d just escaped. He’d been barely aware and unable to move, hardly having a chance to take in his surroundings before everything went black again. _Rudimentary brain activity? organic reconstruction?_ Just how bad off was he, he wondered as other memories started to break through the fog.

The Normandy in flames, almost ripping apart before his feet. The desperate race to the bridge, the need to get to Shepard and keep her safe. Shepard’s screams over his helmet radio, his desperate attempts to say goodbye with his remaining breath...

But he’d been saved. The Alliance must have gotten there quickly, he realized. Or someone had; that woman wasn’t wearing any kind of uniform that Kaidan recognized. Desperate now for more information, he tried the nearby voice recorder. _“The cost of this project is astronomical, over four billion credits.”_ Four billion? What project? Was it talking about _him?_ But four billion credits? For what? Just how long had he been out? Someone, maybe the dark-haired woman, had to have some answers. He left the office and continued through the station.

It wasn’t long before he heard gunfire again. A dark-skinned man was crouched behind a railing, trying to hold off the crowd of mechs on a nearby catwalk. Kaidan watched as the man yanked one of the mechs toward him biotically, then decided to join in, using his own biotics to hurl the mech against the wall. Drawing his pistol, he helped gun down the rest of the hostiles then hurried to join the other man.

“Alenko, didn’t think Miranda would have you up yet. I thought you were still a work in progress.”

“Miranda... was she the one on the intercom?” Maybe he could finally get some information.

“Yeah, she’s in charge of this project. I’m Jacob Taylor, by the way,” Jacob held out a hand. “Been working on security here pretty much since we started.”

“Jacob, listen, this probably isn’t the best time, but would you mind telling me what the _hell_ is going on here?”

“Shit, yeah, I guess getting woken up like that must have thrown you for a loop. I can give you the quick and dirty version. Your ship was destroyed, torn apart. You were killed in the attack; wasn’t much left by the time we got to you. We’ve spent most of the last two years just trying to put you back together. You’ve been comatose, or worse, since we started.”

“Wait,” Kaidan started backing away, “you’re telling me I was dead? _Dead_ dead?”

“No pulse, no respiration, no brain activity.”

“How?” he sputtered, trying to take in what he’d just heard. “Why? I mean, that shouldn’t be _possible._ ”

“That would have to wait until we talk to Miranda. It’s not exactly my area of expertise, you know?”

“Right,” he conceded, though he continued to eye Jacob warily. “Do you know what happened to She-- to the rest of the Normandy’s crew?”

“I know Navigator Pressley was killed in the attack, along with a few others. But most of the crew survived, including Commander Shepard herself. As for where they all ended up after that, couldn’t tell you.”

“I’ll want to try tracking them down when we get out of here, then.”

“Understandable. We’d better get moving then.”

“Lead the way.”

They hadn’t been moving long when they picked up another voice on the radio. Kaidan recalled it from the audio log he’d come across. The bitter one. Kaidan couldn’t blame him, though; he wasn’t sure his life was worth four billion credits either. “ _Jacob?_ ” the voice called, “ _anyone? Is anyone here?_ ”

“Wilson, I’m here,” Jacob responded.

“In the control room right now,” said Wilson, “ trying to keep an eye on the situation. I spotted you on the camera. Take the door to your left; I’ll meet up with you.”

The door Wilson had indicated opened into a darkened equipment room. Kaidan had barely made it through the door when they were ambushed by another group of mechs. He Threw two of them across the room while firing his gun at a third. At least he had some help now, with Jacob proving more than adequate at disposing of the mechs.

“Wilson!” Jacob shouted angrily. “Next time can you try to not direct us into the middle of the hostiles?”

“ _Look, just keep moving, okay? I’ve made it to server room D and-- augh! They’re everywhere.”_ Kaidan heard frantic gunfire in the background. _“Ugh, one of ‘em got me. Hurry!”_

They hurried through the station, Jacob leading the way. “About time,” Wilson barked when they finally reached the server room. “I thought I’d try to hack into the mechs from here, shut ‘em down.”

“You’e a med tech, Wilson. You don’t have the clearance for this,” Jacob said.

“Hey, it was worth a shot. Now are we gonna talk this shit to death or is someone gonna patch up this leg before I bleed out?”

Scanning the walls of the room, Kaidan spotted a medigel dispenser. He grabbed three packets from it and pocketed two, applying the third to the gunshot wound on Wilson’s leg. The wound was pretty nasty, looked like he’d been hit from point blank range, although he didn’t see any mechs nearby that might’ve been responsible. “C’mon,” Kaidan said, reaching his arm down to help Wilson to his feet, “we need to keep moving.”

Finally the shuttle bay was in sight. The door slid open as they approached to reveal Miranda standing in the doorway. He’d noticed how attractive she was on the vidlog, of course, but in person she was a knockout. Not that it mattered, of course. His only thoughts were for Shepard. They just had to get out of here...

“Miranda,” said Wilson, “you’re alive?”

Miranda drew the pistol clipped to her belt. “Despite your best efforts, yes.” She pulled the trigger, dropping Wilson to the ground.

Kaidan could only gasp. Jacob was slightly more composed. “What was that?”

“Wilson was a traitor. He sabotaged the facility, released the mechs, turned them against us. And now we need to get out of here before more of them show up.”

Kaidan looked down at Wilson, but there was nothing he could do now. Reluctantly, he turned and boarded the shuttle with Jacob and Miranda.

He didn’t know where they were going or what was going to happen when they got there, but seeing Miranda gun down Wilson in cold blood only strengthened his resolve to get the hell out of there and go after Shepard at his first opportunity. As he was pretty much stuck where he was at the moment, he settled for glaring at Miranda.

She sighed, finally tiring of it. “He was obviously guilty, Lieutenant. He set up all three of us to get killed.” Kaidan had, in fact, come to a similar conclusion. The audio logs revealing the man’s progressively injured pride, the way he’d guided them straight into a room full of hostile mechs, the suspicious leg wound-- yeah, he probably had been guilty. Still...

“I thought a trial might have been in order. Or did humanity give up on due process in the past two years?”

“We handle things a little differently in our organization.”

“Oh, and what organization might that be.”

Jacob leaned forward before Miranda could respond. “We’re with a group called Cerberus.”

“Jacob!” Miranda snapped.

Jacob shrugged. “He’d have found out sooner or later.”

“Cerberus? The guys doing experiments with husks, and Thorian creepers, oh, and I think there was something with Thresher maw venom?”

“Acid,” muttered Miranda.

Well, she wasn’t trying to deny it. “Is that what you were doing with me in there? I’m another one of your experiments? Well, congratulations. You won. You figured out how to cheat death using me as your test subject. Good for you.”

“Is that what you think?” Miranda shook her head at him. “Believe me, lieutenant, you’re not just a guinea pig. You’re far too valuable for that.”

“Valuable? How? Actually, you know what, it doesn’t matter. Because as soon as we get somewhere with a functional comm system, I’m calling the Alliance. If you think I’m going to work with you, you’re crazy.”

“I hope you'll reconsider once you've spoken with the Illusive Man.”

“Illusive Man? Really? Is that supposed to inspire confidence?”

Miranda narrowed her eyes at him.

“Great,” muttered Kaidan. He’d been kidnapped by mad scientists led by a man with delusions of enigma. Still, he was alive, and so was Shepard. That was something; really, it was everything. He’d sort out the rest when he had the chance.


End file.
